Empowerment is not necessarily within our power to give to others. However, if we want to create more empowering co-created relationships and systems, here are some things to consider.
Intersectionality:
Many feel like only parts of themselves are seen, and for real empowerment, we need to have all of ourselves acknowledged as important. We also have to be conscious of the various parts of ourselves that are at play in relationships.
Intentionality:
Strategies for empowerment that lack intention often fall flat. We have to consider what we are doing and why. What to we want to achieve? Is it within our power or responsibility? What’s the potential impact?
Direct Communication:
Words are more meaningful when we mean them and they are communicated directly. When was the last time someone told you what they appreciate about you? When was the last time you told someone else what you appreciate about them?
Mindfulness:
Being mindful allows us to consider intentionality, intersectionality, and provides us the space for directness. We can rid ourselves of impulsive and urgent reactions over time so that we can more meaningfully promote empowerment.
Financial Health and Charitable Giving
Financial health is super important to our well-being. If you are wanting to regularly make charitable donations and have the means, try adding it to your monthly budget.
Budgeting ensures that funds will be there when something important comes along that you want to support or so you can feel empowered to do so regularly.
Giving too much can literally exhaust our resources and no one would want you to give more than you have.
When you budget, you can choose the amount and either let it build or use it regularly. I have found it to help with intentionality regarding giving.
Give it a try!
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: Present Moment Awareness & Antiracism work
The last ACT post was on values, because those are what drive us. I’m going with present moment awareness this time because we need access to the moment to use the other ACT skills.
Present Moment Awareness is like mindfulness and is literally how it sounds: awareness of the present moment. Right now. And now. And now. And so on.
The good news is that the moment is quite literally always there. So, if you ever remember to notice it, there will be many data points for you to notice.
In ACT, we refer to the things we notice in the moment as internal or external events.
External events might be things you observe with your senses. It could be a “sigh” you overheard, or a grimace on someone’s face. We want to be careful to just notice these things, and not to dive into interpretations or judgments, as those take us further from the moment.
Internal events can actually be those thoughts! But instead, it is an awareness of that as part of the present moment. The sound or vibration of breath is something to notice internally (sometimes we can hear it too). We also can notice things like knots in the stomach, chest tightness, burning sensations in the face, or relief!
Noticing the moment helps us get grounded when we need to, like in stressful conversations or when we have witnessed a devastating event.
Practice is important and necessary. Coming back to the moment when we are stressed is VERY HARD. Our brain and body resist it actually. So, it’s beneficial to practice when we are doing just fine!
Try it right now. Notice 2-5 things. Internal or external. It doesn’t matter what. And you don’t have to stay here.
That’s the other part. There’s no perfect way to be in the moment (we are trying to get away from white supremacy perfectionism, anyway, right?), and we don’t have to stay in it. We aren’t built for sustained, everlasting mindfulness. Just come back when you remember. Or set a timer!
Why is this important for anti racist work??
We have to be able to notice what is happening to understand it and to shift our responses toward how we want to respond outwardly. We can work to create the small spaces for intention and care to do this work. Present Moment Awareness can also help us even witness the racist thoughts or emotional reactions we have.
Many times we actively stay out of the present to avoid thoughts/feelings, but if we don’t notice them, how can we work on them? So, noticing what’s there, allowing it to show to the surface, allows us to take the next steps.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: Values & Antiracism work
In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, values are considered important in changing our focus from a reactionary way of living to a life that includes purpose and meaning, even in the presence of discomfort.
When doing anti racism work, placing values at the forefront can help us recenter ourselves to what is important. We can then base our next steps based on our values, allowing for more intention and conscious action.
A couple of notes:
-Considering our values doesn’t mean we are going to do everything right or perfect.
-Many values can be important at once. Sometimes one might be of higher need than another. It is okay to prioritize your values. Often, you will find they build upon one another anyway.
Do’s and Don’ts of Supporting Someone With Cancer
Previously posted in the Sacramento Valley Psychological Association newsletter & on sacwellness.com
First and foremost, finding out that you have cancer is a very shocking and life-altering event, which includes various stages of grief and emotions over the duration of the experience. As a helper, it is important to keep in mind some of the things a cancer patient might be thinking or experiencing through the journey. Here I go through some reflections from a personal vantage point.
1. It’s Too Late to Prevent/Predict
There are many messages in society that create a “morality story” around cancer. It is easy for a cancer patient to wonder what they have done wrong to have this happen.
ADVICE: Try to avoid asking how this happened. This could suggest that there was some way it could have been prevented, and promote feelings of shame. It’s too late for prevention.
Sometimes you might want to help with future prevention. Regardless of the likely good intentions, trust that the person is likely already thinking of this, and may not need that sort of support.
2. Be Wary of Giving Advice
ADVICE: Be cautious of advice giving. The cancer patient will likely have a full team of medical professionals to help them. I had my oncologist, nurses, a nurse navigator, and access to free counseling and nutrition. Many people want to be helpful and send information about nutrition and ways to cure or prevent cancer recurrence, or help with symptoms. This is not bad. Just make sure it is welcome. Ask first. Also, certain suggestions may not actually be recommended during whatever treatment a person is getting. During chemotherapy, for example, many supplements just simply aren’t going to work or could reduce the impact of the medication. Food (not supplements) is the ideal source of nutrients, and sometimes what one can take is just going to be related to how they feel.
3. Especially Advice about what’s “Right” and “Wrong”
ADVICE: Try to stay away from suggestions of “right” and “wrong” ways to go about treatment. I watched a doctor shame a patient who was eating McDonald’s in the infusion room by asking her, “so, how’s the healthy eating going?” She responded that she “just wanted that that day” and usually eats healthy. I had initially passed judgments myself, but quickly realized that I do not actually know anything about her eating habits, and I would not want to be held to the highest possible standard during the most difficult time in my life either. Yes, you may know of recommendations and helpful things, but not everyone is the same, and you just want to be mindful about the message you send. It isn’t always empowering to hear about the right and wrong way to do something, especially from someone who hasn’t gone through it.
Another example: you’ve congratulated one cancer patient for doing something “good” during their treatment. How does this make other cancer patients feel if they didn’t do that “good” thing? How does the person feel who did it? What if they hadn’t? Would they have been as supported?
4. Don’t Make Comparisons—It’s All Relative
ADVICE: Try not to compare the person’s cancer to other people’s cancer experiences, or types of cancer. Everyone’s experience is so different, so comparing these differences could bring up the feeling of which is more valid, and whose experience is “worse.” Especially stay away from, “at least…” or “could be worse” types of statements. These are conclusions the cancer patient can come to on their own, they don’t need anyone else to provide this insight. Some could say that my experience was of the “easier” types of cancers to treat and deal with, however, that doesn’t mean that I didn’t experience similar feelings (fears of dying, etc.) that cancer patients with more “serious” diagnoses experience. The most helpful kind of comparing is regarding similarities. Validating a person’s experience (emotionally and physically) can be very helpful.
5. Be a Source of Support
ADVICE: Cancer patients rely on their support communities. This is one of the most essential things I’ve learned and immediately submitted to. I initially wanted to resist the support and to stop reaching out, but did it because I knew that I would need it. I know this partially because I’m a mental health professional, but not everyone will be able to ask for or accept help.
There are many ways to show up for someone who has been diagnosed with cancer and is going through treatment.
Here are some ways:
Visit, if you can. Seeing people in person helps the patient and you feel connected, not alone, and allows you to actually see what is happening (vs. imagining).
Call them. Speaking on the phone helps reduce the loneliness and fear as well. It is sometimes nicer to hear a voice than see a text. It can also be exhausting to send the same texts to a lot of people. I personally didn’t mind repeating a story over the phone. It actually felt like I was able to connect with someone and have a shared life update. Call more than once if you can. This is a long process. It was also nice for me to hear what was going on for others, since being at home and out of my normal routine was isolating.
Share your feelings about the person getting cancer. This might not be helpful for everyone, but it was helpful for me to hear how hard it was on my loved ones when they found out I had cancer. It made me feel significantly less alone, and very loved. So, don’t necessarily hold back your feelings and tears. Of course, there is always a line where you might be asking too much of the cancer patient, so just ask if what you are sharing is okay, and be open to the answer. I also noticed that those who avoided their emotions ended up being less helpful, and sometimes made more hurtful mistakes (particularly for those closer to me). Communication is important. Get additional help for yourself if it is just too much.
Send packages/cards. Getting things in the mail was a treat. Just be mindful of what a person might actually like/want. Getting too much unnecessary stuff can make for more work during a difficult time.
Organize a MealTrain or GoFundMe. I cannot underscore how much these supports helped me. A friend organized a MealTrain for me, so we had people bring meals on two days a week. This was so helpful during a time when I did not have the energy/stamina to make dinner, and it was tough on my partner to come home from work and cook every night. I felt uncertain about the GoFundMe at first, because I didn’t want to take money from people. I didn’t want to feel in debt to anyone. But after talking with loved ones, I realized that people wanted a way to help, and this was a very tangible way. In addition, since I am self-employed and was not able to work during this time, this took away the added stress of finances that living expenses and medical bills bring. I’m sure there are other ways to do these things, but these are just the websites I used.
Email/text. I know I said calls are more helpful, but it is still very nice to hear from people regularly. It is lonely being at home, and I was not always up for a full out conversation. So the regular check-ins were super helpful. Don’t hesitate to ask questions, but you can communicate that it is okay to not answer. And share about yourself. It can be isolating to be alone and out of the day to day events of society, so hearing what is going on for others keeps a person feeling like they haven’t been forgotten.
Once chemotherapy is over, don’t go away. It can be easy to assume that the now cancer-free person is alright and not in need of support, but symptoms can last for some time, and the transition back into “normal” life can be hard. A couple of good links to understand what life after treatment might be like: https://www.cancer.org/treatment/survivorship-during-and-after-treatment/be-healthyafter-treatment/life-after-cancer.html and http://www.cancer.ca/en/cancer-information/cancer-journey/life-aftercancer/
6. People Make Mistakes
ADVICE: Don’t take anything too personally. If you are reading this, and thinking that you may have messed up, don’t. No one does cancer “right,” not the patient and not the friends/family. It is a messy and scary process for everyone involved and it is okay to mess up. For example, you may be the one to make a cancer joke around the patient. That will happen. “Sorry” works perfectly fine! We all live and learn. I’m just here to write about some of the things I learned while going through something that I never expected to go through.
7. Patience Patience Patience
ADVICE: Lastly, be patient. I went through chemotherapy in addition to having nephrostomy tubes for 7 weeks and ureteral stents for 3 ½ months, which made me experience a range of symptoms at different times, such as nausea, body aches, hormonal changes, irritability, sadness/grief/fear, sore throats, infections, and digestive issues. I wasn’t been able to work, go out in public places much, walk very far, or do many of my normal daily activities. Even when I seemed “fine,” I was often tired, and could get wiped out by just one or two simple tasks. It was most helpful when I was able to have help and understanding along the way.
I hope these points of advice are useful. It isn’t necessary to remember them all, but even just trying to keep them in mind could help. I know it isn’t always possible, because we all have needs, but try to be patient and remember that this is temporary.
Domestic Violence: Diversity Matters
From the September 2014 SVPA Newsletter
Ryan A. Cheperka, Ph.D.
SVPA Diversity Chair
In 1981, the Day of Unity was observed by the National Coalition of Domestic Violence (http://www.ncadv.org/). Since then, October has become Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and many cities and towns around the country hold an annual rally and march, called Take Back the Night. If you have ever attended such a march, you may have noticed the diversity in the crowd and the attention speakers often give to issues of oppression and inequality that surround a culture of violence. Some may wonder, “Why talk about racism? This march is about violence against women.” Or, “All domestic violence is just as bad - why does it matter what your background is?” Well, I will briefly attend to those questions here, with hope that the conversation about diversity, culture, and domestic violence continues in your lives and communities.
Sometimes the best way to answer a difficult question, like the examples above, is with another question. To begin, I will list a few questions that Thelma Bryant-Davis poses in her book, Thriving in the Wake of Trauma, that can help navigate a growing awareness of the impact of culture on trauma.
How does a woman’s faith affect her feelings about her own anger in the context of domestic violence?
How does a man’s sexual orientation affect his sense of safety in the context of being discriminated against in the workplace?
How does an adolescent girl’s race affect her body image in the context of being gang raped?
How does a boy’s mental disability affect his sense of shame in the context of being physically assaulted on the playground?
These questions are examples of how we approach the topic of diversity and culture when we think about domestic violence and the clients/patients we work with who have such experiences. It is crucial in our work as psychologists to attend to cultural oppression when we are working with survivors of abuse. The ways trauma is experienced is through a cultural framework, where values and messages within one’s family or communities influence how the trauma is processed or understood. Further, the inherent trauma of discrimination and oppression most certainly impacts participation in, reactions to, and processing of domestic abuse and violence.
It is important to be attentive to various cultural identities, such as ethnicity, race, sexual orientation, gender, gender identity, religion, ability status, age, and national origin, and how these and other identities intersect with each other and provide a context within which violence occurs. Rather than explain all of the possible ways that cultural identities matter (there is not room for that), I want to leave you with the notion that humans are complex and that culture is like the dye and the stitching of a quilt, bleeding through all of the shapes and patterns while intricately sewing it all together.
As you continue to gain awareness of these complexities and why they matter in the context of domestic violence, I would encourage you to join Sacramento for the 35th annual Take Back the Night march and rally.
Details below:
Website: http://www.sactakebackthenight.org/
When: October 11th (Second Saturday)
Start Time: Resource Fair & Rally: 5:00pm | March: 8:00pm
Location: Sacramento Native American Health Center, Inc.
2020 J Street, Sacramento, CA 95814
References:
Bryant-Davis, T. (2008). Thriving in the Wake of Trauma: A Multicultural Guide. MD: Altamira Press.
Psychologists Serving the African American/Black Communities
See my February article in the SVPA newsletter:
http://www.sacramentovalleypsychologist.com/Default.aspx?pageId=1811495#section4
Content Below:
Ryan A. Cheperka, Ph.D.
SVPA Diversity Chair
February marks the salient time of the year when people in the United States focus on African American or Black history. Although history inclusive of all groups is relevant all months of the year, this is a time when intentional efforts to discuss African Americans within the United States history are most public. It is an important month, as racism and a Black-white dichotomy still strongly exist in the U.S., and much of the country still teaches a less-than-inclusive version of “history.”
Black History Month is also a necessary reminder of how much our country’s harsh history and realities, as well as the contributions of historical figures, are relevant to the field of psychology. Both diversity within the psychological community and amongst the clients/patients we serve are huge factors in the work we do and the societies we build. As a white woman myself, I believe in the “not about us, without us” philosophy of not talking about a particular group without voices from that group. Thus, this article will feature the voices of two psychologists in the Sacramento area, Dr. Tiffany Mimms and Dr. Tameka Jackson, who have focused parts of their practices on the needs of the African American/Black communities.
When asked about why serving the African American community was important to her, Dr. Tameka Jackson responded,
“Despite the continual browning of America and the rising mental health needs of African Americans, only 2% of the nation’s psychologists are Black. This statistic, coupled with the stigma associated with mental illness in the Black community, fuel my passion and commitment for serving the needs of this group. While there a number of reasons that Blacks may be reluctant to make use of psychological solutions to emotional hurdles, one is a fear that the counselor may not be fully aware of the social and economic realities of their lives. As a Black female psychologist, my mere presence, for many Black clients provides a sense of comfort and connection and can often demystify the process of mental health treatment.”
The information Dr. Jackson described highlights the need for increased accessibility to treatment and the importance of “mere presence” in various health professions. With a similar spirit in mind, Dr. Tiffany Mimms established the Rosetta Center for Counseling and Wellness: A Place for Health, Healing, and Hope. Dr. Mimms described the center’s services,
“The Rosetta Center offers psychological services such as individual and group psychotherapy, wellness services such as yoga and massage, community outreach events such as mental health screening days and an annual wellness conference, training opportunities for interns, and an ongoing research program. Although the Rosetta Center is welcoming of all people, it has a specific focus on reaching African American women.”
More specifically, Dr. Mimms highlighted the mission of the Rosetta Center that will help guide the growth of the center and meet a specific community need:
“The mission of the Rosetta Center is to identify and meet the psychological needs of women and their families with a focus on African American women by creating a place of holistic healing and rejuvenation. It is the goal of the Rosetta Center to empower, educate, and affirm women of color to thrive and live their true calling. The Rosetta Center also seeks to build relationships and collaborate with supportive others (allies, men, other people of color) to build a stronger community and world.”
Dr. Jackson holds her individual private practice within the Rosetta Center as well. Collaboration among professionals is crucial to the center’s goals and allows for a broader shared mission. When asked about her specific interests and passions, Dr. Jackson shared,
“I am especially interested in working with Black women and providing a safe space that incorporates culturally congruent techniques. I strive to empower Black women across their intersecting identities, help them connect to their authentic voices, which are often silenced, and to facilitate a belief that strength is ever present in the practice of vulnerability.
For generations, many black women have internalized messages that they must be strong at all times and be everything for everyone, leaving no space for self-care. It is such a blessed moment each time a Black woman comes into my space and gives herself permission to ‘just be.’”
Some examples of therapy groups held at the Rosetta Center for Counseling and Wellness include an Adolescent Girls Group, Professional Black Women’s Support Group, and Healing from Sexual Trauma Group. The psychological and wellness services, community outreach, and opportunities for research and training provide for a quality holistic approach that is an asset to the Sacramento community. The center’s growth is quite exciting, as Dr. Mimms intends to continue to increase the types of services provided that allow for empowerment and well-being.
For more information about Dr. Tiffany Mimms and the Rosetta Center for Counseling and Wellness, visit:http://www.therosettacenter.com/
For more information about Dr. Tameka Jackson, visit: http://www.drtamekajackson.com/
Substance Use, Addiction, and Recovery
Check out this California Rehab and Addiction Resources site and my interview in the Therapist Spotlight:
http://www.alltreatment.com/ca#362
Copied from the site:
What types of services do you offer? What issues do you specify treatment for?
I offer individual, couples, and group therapy for adults and late-adolescents. My specialty areas include those with histories of abuse or sexual violence, as well as working with the LGBTQ community. I generally work with a broad range of concerns, including substance use issues, eating disorders, depression, anxiety, difficulty coping, relationship issues, and self-worth/self-esteem.
I also provide workshops to businesses/organizations related to diversity, wellness, and conflict/communication.
What therapy modalities do you use in your practices?
I use an integrative approach to therapy, which includes Interpersonal, Relational-Cultural, Emotion-focused, and Psychodynamic theories. I also utilize some strategies from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), Motivational Interviewing (MI), and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).
When should one seek treatment?
One should definitely seek treatment when managing life tasks and keeping up with daily functioning becomes difficult or out of control. A person might also seek treatment when small changes in relationships, mood, or life events occur. We can often go much deeper in therapy when a person is feeling okay. If one waits until there is a crisis, the crisis will have to be dealt with first. So, definitely seek therapy in crisis, but also when most pieces of life are okay yet some improvement could be made.
What relationship exists between mental health and substance abuse? What services do you provide for someone suffering with either and/or both?
Mental health and substance abuse are interrelated and have a cyclical relationship. They both impact one another. We may increase substance use in order to deal with mental health issues (life stressors). Increased substance use also may increase life stressors and mental health concerns. I provide services that focus on the whole person and how substances play a role in their broader picture. I can help with readiness for change, harm-reduction, and increasing more effective coping strategies to replace use over time
Awareness of, and Strengths in, Intersections of Identities
Click here to see my article in the January 2014 Newsletter for Sacramento Valley Psychological Association (SVPA)
http://sacramentovalleypsychologist.com/Default.aspx?pageId=1776093#section6
Text below:
By: Ryan A. Cheperka, Ph.D.
SVPA Diversity Co-Chair
After consumption by the holiday season, psychologists and clients alike are reminded of the intricacies of identity and the various communities that we are a part of. Each of our unique identities is associated with our experiences and connects us to others. It is easy to think of our clients in regards to only one or a few of their identities, such as being a woman, a Christian, a person with a disability, or a person of color. We also often categorize people based on singular identities, lumping them with others in that category. However, for those who strongly identify with multiple underrepresented, or “minority,” groups, this singular identity approach can increase a feeling of marginalization. It is important to attend to how a person’s identities intersect and the unique experiences and strengths that are associated with those specific intersections.
Intersectionality can be understood as how identities and associated experiences mutually construct one another; without one, the others would not be the same. Authors like Kimberlé Williams Crenshaw, Elizabeth R. Cole, and Lisa Bowleg have discussed types of intersectionality, such as structural and political intersectionality. An example of structural intersectionality is how a woman of color’s position at the intersection of race and gender is qualitatively different from that of a white woman. Political intersectionality represents the situation that those with multiple minority statuses face in regards to being affected by political agendas of more than one group, with the resulting need to split one’s political energy described as intersectional disempowerment (Crenshaw, 1994). These concepts are important not only because they highlight how easily certain groups can experience marginalization, but also because they enable psychologists to more fully understand the unique experiences of specific groups and to provide better care.
In the spirit of providing better services to underrepresented and marginalized groups, I focused my dissertation project on the experiences of those who identified as African American or Black, queer/lesbian, and mostly female (one trans* man). The study was qualitative and 12 individuals were interviewed about their life experiences, factors that have had a positive and/or negative impact on them, and about their personal strengths. Psychology literature has historically focused on disadvantages of minority groups, so a strengths-based focus seemed important. If we are able to see a person as a whole and really know what they bring to the world, I imagine we can help them much more by including strengths than if we only focus on what problems they face. Thus, I will discuss some of the important findings from my study, Strengths in intersecting identities: The experience of being Black and a sexual and gender minority (Cheperka, 2012).
Through exploration and processing of information from their lives, participants described a context that both challenged and supported them. The context included the larger society and sociocultural factors, various communities that participants were a part of (e.g., LGBT community), religious and spiritual influences, and connections with important interpersonal relationships. Through navigating both positive and negative experiences in all of these contexts, participants developed various strengths. Atendency toward intrapersonal growth and development was very common, as self-reflection, resilience, and coming to understand one’s identity and worthiness were evident. Perseverance was notable among the group, as each of them were goal-oriented, determined, motivated, or had an impressive sense of optimism. Participants also displayed an admirable sense ofconnection with others, through their expressed empathy, helping behaviors, open-mindedness, and nonjudgmental aspirations. Participants had developed strong coping mechanisms over time, which included use of spirituality and creativity. And lastly, participating in activism was important, as their experiences had led them to embrace advocacy, education, and empowerment of others.
This study is just one example of how important gathering deeper meaning and understanding of intersecting identities can be. Not only within the person, but how our identities as psychologists intersect or interact with those of our clients, is crucial to explore and examine. As was found through this study, relationships and community had a huge impact, and can yield both pain and impeccable growth. The few factors mentioned here may assist both psychologists and clients in recognizing and capitalizing on internal strength.
Works Cited:
Cheperka, R. C. (2012). Strengths in intersecting identities: The experience of being Black and a sexual and gender minority. Unpublished doctoral dissertation. Southern Illinois Univerisity, Carbondale.
Crenshaw, K. W. (1995). Mapping the margins: Intersectionality, identity politics, and violence against women of color. In K. Crenshaw, N. Gotanda, G. Peller, & K. Thomas (Eds.), Critical race theory: The key writings that formed the movement (pp. 357-384). New York: New Press.